Tonight as I lay down to rest for the night, the overwhelming question I must ask myself is this: do I trust God?
At camp I prayed over a student that wanted to follow Jesus but he found it was too hard to give up living his own way. As I prayed over him, I prayed to God, “You’re not calling him to follow me, you’re calling him to follow You. And I know you will show up in his life and prove You are trustworthy … please do that in a tangible way this week in this guy’s life.”
Because I believe we can trust God. My heart has been heavy – for years – for a few specific kids I know because they aren’t in ideal circumstances. And I’ll do what I can do – what God has entrusted to me – and I’ll attack what God has put before me with the full weight and power and fire and passion of the Holy Spirit.
And then when I’ve done all I can do, I’ll agonize over it because it wasn’t as much as I wanted to do, and I’ll spend a week or two falling asleep thinking and praying over it.
And then I’ll slowly give it to God, trusting people I care about to a really big God who has proven so faithful in so many ways in my own life. I trust God because I know that any love I have for these guys can only come from Him, and because He sent us to cross paths, I know God has to love them so much more than I do.
And because He loves, I can trust.